My Youngest’s Week of 12
Josie’s day 4 of her Week of 12
In the Middle of It
As I type this, we are in the middle of my nearly-12-year-old’s Week of 12! I do have to say that the thirdborn is handling the task load of this week with far more grace than either of my first two. (Sorry, guys.)
Maybe it’s the fact that she has seen this done twice before, or perhaps it’s that she has longed for this rite of passage much longer than the other two. There’s also a possibility that she just lucked out with a personality that fits well with this challenge.
No matter the reason, her flaws seem to be showing up much less than mine this go-round.
Grocery Store Wake-Up Call
Yesterday we went to the grocery store, and I quickly realized I had put way more attention toward my older two than I had the baby of this family.
From a young age, her older siblings were helping to choose avocados and melons in the produce section; they were helping load and unload groceries. And, while I could have sworn that she had also participated in all these ripe learning activities, watching her handle an awkward shopping cart and try to decipher between zucchini and cucumbers gave me a sinking feeling.
The Gaps I Didn’t See
Not only at the grocery store, but also in the home, I got a blank stare when I asked her to empty the vacuum and clean the microwave.
She had never navigated to soccer.
She had never entered a credit card online.
She didn’t know how to check clothing tags before washing.
I could NOT believe I had missed teaching her these things, especially considering I had literally created the skill checklists meant to guide parents through all of this.
Cue the imposter syndrome.
But Then... the Refrigerator
As I was cataloging all these missed moments as personal failures, I walked in the house to find half of my refrigerator on the counter.
“Mom, the bottom of the fridge, underneath the drawer, was disgusting!”
Had I ever taught this child how to clean out the refrigerator? No.
“Also, your laundry is ready and the dog food is low, so I put that on the list. I haven’t started tacos yet, but there were a few things past their dates, so I wrote ‘expired’ on the package since I wasn’t sure if you wanted it thrown away or not.”
I stared in awe.
“Girl, you’re blowing me away with how resourceful you are. You just take care of business!”
smile “I feel really responsible, Mom. Like I’m really good at this stuff.”
When It All Comes Together
What I’m realizing is:
Yes, I missed more than a few checks on the skill sheets.
No, she’s not going to be the one to mow a yard.
But the boxes that have been checked—combined with years of watching her siblings go before her—have produced something beautiful:
A capable and responsible problem-solver, who, when push comes to shove, will take a challenge head-on.
Want to Build Confidence, Even if You Haven’t Taught Everything Yet?
You don’t have to go back and redo every lesson you missed.
Start with one small skill this week.
Or even just have a conversation that invites your child to notice and step in.
The goal isn’t a perfect checklist.
It’s a capable heart.
And it’s never too late to begin.
